In fact, police have yet to come up a single eyewitness. ![]() Many don't even know they've been victimized until it's too late. Even the victims themselves rarely catch a glimpse of the thieves. Merchandise of every size and description from skateboards to stereo systems has been disappearing from store shelves and storage areas at an alarming rate. Even more alarming is the baffling and often bizarre nature of these crimes. Instead of getting better, things are actually getting worse. With complaints ranging from purse snatching to breaking and entering, police switchboards have been swamped with the angry voices of more and more citizens who have fallen prey to the recent surge of crime that continues to plague the city. So good in fact that there appear to be no eyewitnesses to any of these crimes. Much more than just a series of small, isolated incidents, it's now apparent that an organized criminal element is at work and at the moment, business is good. Gosh, it's kinda like Moonlighting, isn't it? It's me who should thank you for that privilege, right? Oh, well what do you want? You want a thank you? Hey, broadzilla, you wouldn't even be standin' here if it weren't for me, okay? I was just trying to break it to you easy. What did you do? Did you take classes in insensitivity? Well, hey, you just saved yourself an eight-mile round-tripper. He left a message on your machine, uh, just before we got out. I need to get to a phone and call my boss. My nearest neighbors are about four miles away. on a little language barrier thing going here. You know, I don't think that you're listening. Primatene might just help to clear that up there. And soon, I gave them all names: Leonardo, Michaelangelo Teaching them all that I had learned from my master. More words followed, and I began their training. I was amazed by how intelligent they seemed, but nothing could have prepared me for what happened next: one of them spoke. I gathered them up in an old coffee can and when I awoke the next morning, I received a shock. The little ones were crawling into a strange glowing ooze from a broken canister nearby. And then, one day, I came upon a shattered glass jar and four baby turtles. When we were forced to come to New York, I found myself for the first time without a home, wandering thew sewers, scavaging for whatever I could find. Before that time, I was a pet of my master Yoshi. Your instructor is Casey Jones.įor 15 years now, we have lived here. Well, it looks like you're the one who needs to be taught a lesson, pal. who died and made you referee? You did your job, now get out of here and let me do mine, all right? These JV low lifes need to be taught a lesson. ![]() How about a five-minute game misconduct for roughing, pal? ![]() And *this* is the penalty.Īnd let's not forget my personal favorite: two minutes for high sticking. Now *that*, was a crime, you purse-grabbing pukes.
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